Sotheby's Auction House placed the only known surviving tooth of the famed former Beatle, John Lennon, on the block and it fetched $31,000 this past week. It is claimed a Canadian dentist took the remarkable dental artifact with his winning bid. A spokesman for the famous British auctioneers are reportedly in contact with Lennon's widow, Yoko Ono, making final negotiations for the sale of Sean Lennon, one of only two known offspring sired by the famous pop star.
Sotheby's spokesperson, Bridgette Lacy Cornwallace-Colanspasm, great-great granddaughter of the Grand Duke and Duchess of Derbanshire, Colonel Reginald and Buffy Cornwallace-Colanspasm, who are credited with introducing cricket and croquette into India and inventing the first all cotton adult diaper, indicates the negotiations are going well, but Yoko wants to start the bidding at 100,000 pounds, which may put off some bidders for young Master "Sean Rennon" as Yoko refers to him. Word on the street in London is Yoko will have her way. She always does.
In a related development, Ringo Starr, has offered Sotheby's his bellybutton lint collection which he has fastidiously kept squirreled away in a secret drawer in his flat in London.
"If Johnny's rotten molar fetched that kind of money, there outta be a quid or two for me in me bellybutton lint." The affable former Beatle drummer is quoted as saying with an earnest twinkle in his left eye.
Former Beatle, George Harrison, could not be reached for comment.
Paul McCartney, just back from his honeymoon, when asked about the Lennon tooth, stepped back for a moment then came out with one of the best lines for a song ever.
"What can you say about John Lennon's tooth that hasn't already been said? From the looks of that hideous molar it was definitely his sweet tooth. I'm glad a dentist got it. It needs a crown. Give teeth a chance. Peace"
In a personal note, I will offer the holder of M. Gadhafi's golden gun one thousand dollars cash for this one of a kind weapon.
Please contact me at this address if you are willing to take my offer. There is some wiggle room on that price. I will pay for shipping and handling. If it is bloody, do not wash it, gold will not pit.
Jack Maybolt, President Urban Poverty Law Center
I saw the Beatles in 1966 in Memphis, since then my life has been an endless series of setbacks and disappointments! jdm
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