I do not deserve the attention I am getting from our illustrious leaders in Washington, but for some reason I have been included in the select few who get to read the planned speech on jobs that President Obama is to deliver on next Thursday evening in front of a joint session of congress and his 20 million supporters who are all but a handful, government employees.
His Jobs Czar, Robert Rothseignbergur Smith-Jones, IV, has sought me out to make my comments on the content. I have enclosed excerpts that I found interesting and objectionable. I did not sign a waiver of silence. Here it is, warts and all.
"Good evening, Mr. President, Mr. Speaker, members of congress, and my fellow Americans. Tonight I want to talk to you about something that is very important, not only to our countrymen but to this great big family style government that is here to serve you, our fellow Americans.
I know it seems like it has grown like topsy since I took over as your supreme leader just a little over two years ago. But along with serving in many distinct areas from border protection, to terror prevention, to keeping the air we breathe and the water we drink safe for our citizens, to maintaining an armed force which is the envy of the world, to providing each of our citizens affordable health care, to making sure all our children have their educational needs met, and that our citizens who have fallen on hard times do not fall through the cracks that are forming in the safety nets of our infrastructure, we also print and borrow money to spend on our friends in businesses that support us with generous contributions!
But I did not come here tonight to talk about all the waste and profligate spending which we have undertaken over the past three years. That is water under the bridge to nowhere. I am Barack Hussein Obama and I am here to talk jobs for ordinary Americans.
I am talking about unemployment and the problems it presents our society. Our neighbors are hurting. Unable to add minutes to a phone plan, some of our fellow Americans have given up looking for work. These are the worst of times, and yet the best of times for our millionaires and billionaires, many of whom are clamoring to pay more of a share in taxes.
Warren Buffett, a billionaire, by his own admission does not think it fair to pay less than his secretary in federal income taxes. I agree. I think we can all agree on this.
Sarah Palin is a nincompoop and a dimwitted bimbo with a nice pair of legs. I don't mind if she runs out on those perfectly molded legs and gets the fellows in the West Wing of the White House some Maxwell House coffee, but as CEO? Well, you get my drift.
Ditto Congresswoman Michelle Bachmann. She'd look better under the desk in the Oval Office than behind it. She is not very large. Cute as a button, as they say.
As part of my jobs proposal tonight I am asking the congress, both the republican controlled house and the democrat controlled senate to have a bill on my desk in the morning that will employ 35 million Americans immediately, and create a product that can be sold world wide for a huge profit and that has low overhead. We will take these profits and plow them back into the business of business and hire another 35 million Americans and double our productivity. These are high paying jobs with full benefits including dental insurance!
The product is not to add to the earth's carbon dioxide load and should be green.
I have asked the US Treasury to hire these people to print our new gold backed money, which I am announcing here tonight for the first time. Each goldbondobama unit, will come in denominations of the quarter-bama, half-bama, bama, fivebama, tenbama, twentybama, fiftybama, hundredbama and the 1000bama, the thousandbama. These will be taking the place of the green back which has seen this country through some tough times.
This new currency will carry the full faith and credit of the United States and be legal tender for all debts both public and private. As yet, we have not pegged the bama to gold, but think the 1000bama will be redeemable for a half ounce of pure gold. Gold you can touch and sink your teeth into if you so desire. I have just ordered that gold in private hands is illegal and all your gold must be turned into the treasury department by next week or the fine is severe. We know who owns the gold and we need it to save our jobs.
Joe Biden will be happy to answer any questions you might have regarding our plans.
Thank you and God Bless America!"
As the president of the Urban Poverty Law Center, it is a fine plan and a wonderful speech. I will reserve judgement on how well, the vice president preforms until after the event.
Jackson Delano Maybolt
"Gold and silver, like sugar and spice and everything nice should back America's currency! Do we look stupid, or what?" Mother Maybolt, 1923-2008
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