At the Urban Poverty Law Center we are looking for any sign of intelligent life inside the beltway. Our media researchers have our satellite receivers directed at Washington DC, and are trying to decipher if any of the transmissions over the airways have any meaning. A few of our interceptions follow:
"We will default on our obligations unless congress raises the debt ceiling."
Really means we will default later on our obligations which will be more unruly in a few years if congress continues to raise our debt ceiling. Time to take the hit now. Bitter medicine, but needs to be taken.
"It is time for the rich to start paying their fair share of taxes."
Because we, in Washington, DC, do not have the courage to pry that greasy, grimy, engorged governmental teat out of our friend's mouths, we would much rather anger the wealthiest 1% of our citizens, who have for the most part worked hard to earn over $250,000 a year, which after taxes affords these pampered workaholics a solidly middle class lifestyle. No lobster, and no champagne and no trips to Martha's Vineyard for these wealthy bastards, but they can afford to buy health insurance for themselves and their families!
"Under my plan energy costs would necessarily skyrocket."
If you can still afford to buy energy enough to travel and stay warm, it is under taxed.
We are continuing to monitor the area known as the beltway for intelligent life.
As you can see from these few sited examples there is little hope of finding any intelligence over there. We are alone out here in fly-over country.
Jackson Delano Maybolt President, Urban Poverty Law Center
"Wait one half hour after eating before entering the water to swim. Many children have drown from a fatal stomach cramp after swimming too soon after eating."
Mother Maybolt, 1921-2008
No comments:
Post a Comment